But Mostly, I Want to Wish You a Happy New Year

I haven't been particularly introspective as this year has changed.

I know you're shocked. 'Cause that's pretty much my MO.

I'm fairly shocked by this myself.

I mean, this is the girl who, every New Year's Eve, would drive herself to some beautiful mountain locale, take out her journal and, from the confines of her warm car and with a woodscape laid out snowily before her, would write. Her words would pour onto the page in a handwriting I can barely recognize now, saying this is what I learned from the past year and this is what I hope to gain in the next.

Yada yada yada.

Although yesterday I had a day in which everything seemed entirely possible. One of those bright, shiny, happy days--one of those bright, shiny, happy winter days no less (which appear to be slightly brighter than all the other days because the sun is reflected on all that clean, white slate of an earth), which breed even more joy, especially at the beginning of a new year. You're with me on this, right?

Well my goodness but I was spilling over with ideas and inspiration and epiphanies just bursting with energy knowing that I can do anything I set my mind to don't you know just don't be getting in my way as I solve the world's problems and write not just one book but two while I blog this and Facebook that and before you know it I can't focus on anything, my head is splitting in two like watermelon on a wall and I'm picking a fight with my hubby and feeling oh-so-sorry for myself I mean s-e-r-i-o-u-s-l-y sorry for myself

...when I remember that I started taking my appetite suppressant again.

So none of that super-woman, super-hero, super-lative stuff was real.

Thank God.

Especially for the pick the fight part. Ugh.

He's forgiven me and all is well, but I did have a discussion in my head pertaining to what lengths we, and by we I mean I, will go to to lose a few pounds.

Knowing that the immediate side-effects will dissipate, though the three-days-long headache that must be endured as my body s-c-r-e-a-m-s for a hot cup of coffee laced with all that delectable caffeine still feels like that watermelon being smashed on a wall.

But the formula has been proven. The last go-round I lost 20 pounds in 2 months and I kept all but 3 off through the holidays. The words my doctor told me last August still ring true. Diet to lose. Exercise to maintain.

20 more pounds--here I come.

But mostly, I want to wish you a happy new year.