In the Interim

in·ter·im  (n.)  An interval of time between one
event, process, or period and another

I find myself banging about here, lately--in the interim.

I'm half-way to losing 30 pounds, which is great. But I'm not there yet and I've got a lot of work to do before I achieve my goal.

I've got a few things that I can't wear at all, mostly pants, so I went shopping yesterday to buy myself some "interim" jeans (a good problem to have, I know.) I picked up a couple of pairs that fit me now that will help me look decent as I continue to lose (my old ones are pretty much hanging off me.) I discovered that I've lost at least one size, two in what I'm sure are "vanity" sizes. If you've never heard this term before, a vanity size is a size given to a piece of clothing that says "10" but is really "12" or "14" because the marketing geniuses know that a woman is far more likely to buy a size 10 when she's really a 12 or 14. Or a 12 when she's really a 14 or 16. And so on. 

A few months ago, if I'd gone in to try on new clothes and discovered that I was a size down, I would have been ecstatic. And while I was very happy yesterday to learn that the proof of my work is in the ability to wear smaller clothes, I wasn't giddy with excitement. Which struck me as odd. It seemed a little anti-climactic, actually.

Why wasn't I more excited?

Because I know I'm in the interim.

Because I know that it's taken me 11 weeks to get this far, and the next 15 are probably going to come off even slower. Which is fine. I'm totally happy with this pace of my weight loss because I think it's a really healthy way to do it. And I think that the chances of me putting it back on are small because I don't feel like I'm dieting. I feel like I'm changing my lifestyle (though I need to get back to exercising every day. I've let that slip, big time.)

So I didn't turn cartwheels in the dressing room. I just felt a momentary blip of superjoy, and then it passed. I didn't feel like celebrating with an ice cream or treating myself to a reward meal. Been there, done that. Those days are gone.

But I did allow myself to have a small nonfat decaf mocha at Barnes & Noble later that day, and I skipped the glass of wine I would have normally had with my Saturday evening meal as a result.

And though I know I'm in the interim, I'm definitely different. Last Friday I got my haircut and wanted to do some shopping afterwards. But I was absolutely starving and I didn't want to have to make healthy choices at a restaurant or fast food joint because, let's face it, there are no true healthy choices at these places, so I decided to come home and eat a good-for-me meal--a green salad with 1/2 a breast of chicken, 1/2 an avacado, and a tomato with nonfat salad dressing.

I must admit, I hardly recognize this girl. But I like her.

In point of fact, as I've been thinking about this concept of "interim," it seems my life is filled with it.

There's a big project at work that I'm really excited about, but I can't tell anyone about it because it's a couple of weeks away from launching. I can't wait for it to be "out there," but there's a lot of concepting and actual work that needs to happen before it can begin. So it's in the interim as well.

I'm in the interim between Mark being gone and when he comes home. 6 days down, 5 to go.

We're in the interim with Nicole. She's living with us now but we don't know when she'll be moving out. I love having her here, but know she needs her space.

We even seem to be in the interim with our weather. It snowed this morning--before the leaves have turned and fallen to the ground for their annual raking. Will we have an early winter? Are we now waiting for a new season before the old one had a real chance to settle in?

And then I realize. We're always living in the interim of one sort or another. We're always gearing up for one aspect in our lives while another is winding down. The real living that we do is exactly what takes place in the interim.

We have but to embrace it.

What interims are you living with right now? Are they annoying you? Are you impatient with them? Or are you making do? Even better, are you able to embrace them?

I know I'm trying. Because as someone once said, "It's not the destination, it's the journey."

I'm still learning this, in the interim.

_{Photo Credit 1                    Photo Credit 2}

Comments

[Becky]

Cath...this is no time for conviction! LOL!
I am impatient and feel like I am in the interim of a LOT of things. Grrr...embrace...embrace {with sarcasm} still embracing...not working...
still embracing...
convicted...

[becky olsen]

Interim...
you just described my entire life all the time.
And I wish I could embrace it, but it is just so darn slippery!
Congrats on the shopping, I hope that you find the energy to do the exercise, it is the fun part!
B-

[Kim Kesti]

Our home is definitely in the interim. Bathroom now has a toilet, but no sink, living room has new tile, but no wall paint, etc. I'm hoping to have this behind us by Christmas. I'm mostly content with living in the now. It seems to me that people say they are "bored" but what they really mean is they are not content with living in the interim. Hmmm...love reading your thought provoking posts.

[Sherry Wright]

What a great accomplishment to be half way there Cath! Your way with words is amazing. Thanks for reminding me to "enjoy the journey". I really needed that this weekend. :0)