25 Years Ago Today

...I became a bride.

I was 19.7 years old, I'd been dating my groom for over three years, I had two years of college under my belt, and I couldn't wait, simply could not wait, to be his wife.

I was head-over-heels in love with the man who had taken me, on one of our early dates, to sit on the lion statues at the state capitol. I was giddy with joy at the sight of the man who bought me Sticky Chewy Chocolate ice cream at Swenson's in Trolley Square, who chased me endlessly at dances in the Masonic Temple, and with whom I watched the dust from Mount St. Helen's stream magically across the sunset as we sat, barely touching, on the hood of a beat-up Camaro.

He was my first kiss, my first relationship, my first love, and I was the fairytale princess.

And as such, I couldn't wait to promise myself to the man who had driven 40 miles the first year we dated just to spend an evening with me, only to turn around a couple of hours later and drive all the way back home.

On this day 25 years ago, I pledged my life to the man with whom I had had so much riotous fun in the Lagoon Show Band, Ute Marching Band, Wind Symphony, and Wind Ensemble through countless rehearsals, endless practice sessions, and dozens and dozens of concerts and performances.

I was overflowing with joy to be exchanging vows with the man who wanted the same things I did in life: children, a little white house, a pair of teaching careers, jazz music on the stereo, and a lifetime of laughter and love.

For he, more than any other, could make me laugh--and oh, oh how I loved him for it.

But somehow, in spite of all that love and laughter, and in spite of our best efforts, we lost our way.  In the 25 years since I became his bride, we have been apart more than twice as long as we were together.  We've each found other spouses, and each of these relationships have lasted longer than ours did.

But really, our relationship will last forever, well beyond these 25 years. For out of this great love came two amazing little girls named Nicole and Rebeccah. They absolutely represent the very best that each of us had to give.

And so, while today is about the day I became a bride so long ago and the silver anniversary that could never be, it's really about the day I vowed to become their mama, and for whom, no matter how painful our break-up, I would not have changed a thing.

Today, I am filled with gratitude. For first loves and lessons learned and honor for the past.

There is always a space in my heart for you. I will always treasure the good times. There will always be a reverance for what we shared.

More than anything, though, I want to thank you.

Thank you, my once-love, thank you for these beautiful angels.

Comments

[wendy sue]

wow, Cath, what an amazing attitude you have -- I love the way you've chosen to honor this slice of your life. Your words are beautiful and I truly admire your perspective. :)

[mariann lucy]

OK, this brought the tears smarting behind my eyes. I remember you in love with this man and was touched to be reminded of how much you did love him then. You're right the s are the best gifts of you both. Love Mariann

[mariann lucy]

And besides you look just like Vicky in your
wedding dress. Wow, huh?

[Daniela]

Wow, this brought tears to my eyes. How sweet and beautiful.

[Alice]

what a beautiful bride and what beautiful little girls...you have a wonderful attitude and I plan to share you story with a few of my friends which are at the point where things are still a bit too painful to ever believe they will be able to look back on their marriages and see the good that once was.

[rae]

Your amazing prose has rendered me speechless yet again, wow Cath, I wish I had an inkling of your way with words. I greatly admire your attitude and positive viewpoint.

[Miss Pat]

Oh Cath. I just love you. *sniff*

[Sherry Wright]

Wow Cath, this brought tears to my eyes. What a wonderful way to honor the day!

[celeste rockwood-jones]

so touching cath, got me all weepy.

[Bethany]

I love that picture of Nicole and Becca! I enjoyed reading all your posts and am glad I found your blog, too.