Meet our PLUs.
This is my brother, Eric, and my sister-in-law, Maria. They are our PLUs.
People Like Us.
PLUs are the people you want to spend the most time with. Because they get your jokes. And they share your penchant for quoting movies and TV series including odd references to M*A*S*H* ("Used to be round," "I thought you were Frank's bag," "Chin-lee!," and "Chloral hydrate!") and Blazing Saddles ("We don't need no stinking badges!", "What in the wide, wide world of sports is going on here?", "A wed wose, how womantic!" and "I think you boys have had enough!")
PLUs are people with whom you have a lot in common. They share your values, your political views, your dinner table, and most importantly your tastes in coffe, wine, and beer.
The fact that we are related is an extra bonus.
PLUs are your peeps. They stand with you through the tough times, laugh with you through the good times, cry with you through the unbearable times, and celebrate with you through the brilliant spots of joy.
We have been through it all together. When Nicole and Beccah were born, Eric and Maria were there. When I got separated and divorced, Eric and Maria were there. When I collapsed on the floor after telling my father I couldn't have a relationship with him until I could deal with him on my own terms instead of his caustic conditions, Eric and Maria were there. When I was about to get married to the man of my dreams, Eric and Maria were there, hosting the wedding in their backyard full of wildflowers. When it proceeded to rain like sheets that entire day, Eric was the one in tears. When it cleared up just long enough for Mark and me to say our vows, it was, indeed, one of those brilliant spots of joy.
We lived within two miles of one another for 12 years of our lives. We dropped in on one another, had impromptu barbecues, hiked, backpacked, and enjoyed the heck out of one another. They babysat my kids and I babysat theirs. Maria and I made quilts and jam together. Eric and Mark went biking together. We had Appetizer-an-Hour New Year's parties, campfires in the backyard, parties on the porch, and more birthday parties than I can count.
When they announced that they were moving to New Hampshire five years ago to pursue a career opportunity, it was a serious blow.
For it isn't easy losing your PLUs. And it hasn't been easy figuring out how to fill the void their absence has left behind in our lives.
But I have managed to visit New Hampshire 8 times now since they left, including a visit just last week after my stint in New York City.
And even though we can't just drop in on one another anymore, and we aren't a part of each other's day-to-day lives, when we are fortunate enough to get together, it's as if no time has passed and we pick up right where we left off before. Indeed, from the minute Eric picked me up from the airport to the minute Maria dropped me off five days later, we were still talking, still exploring topics that had not yet been exhausted.
And so I go to the house in the woods where our PLUs have created an idyllic life for themselves in an idyllic place. A beautiful home full of wonderful children who are growing up to be as strong and as amazing as their parents. And I am grateful. For the opportunities I have to visit, for the privilege and honor of knowing them as closely as I do, and for the love, warmth, support, and understanding they show me when I'm there, and every day across the miles.
What an amazing family you have. It must be so hard to be that far from them. I'm glad you had such a great time together. And I'm glad you found NYC to be a better place during this visit. ;)
Posted by: Anabelle O'Malley | May 28, 2008 at 06:36 AM
Wow, Cath...your youngest niece is your spitting image. How cute!
Posted by: Susan Neal | June 02, 2008 at 10:18 AM
Cath, what a wonderful post.
Posted by: Dale Welcome | August 17, 2009 at 12:48 AM